Bruised soul


You hurt me till all the pain penetrated into my bones, drilling a hole in my soul leaving me tattered and bruised from the inside. 
The pain clawed at me in broad daylight where I had no choice but to blot out my tears behind all the petty excuses I made for the  moisture in my eyes. 

 Tell me,would the universe call me heartless If I just want to come off this emotionally wrecked train and never see you again.

A Parisian dream.

How does it feel like to live in Paris? If anybody actually lives there ,please tell me !

Everyone has this romantic idea  of a particular place in mind where they’d like to visit.

Mine happens to be Paris.  😘

I would love to visit Paris one day, alone or with my parents as it has been forever on my bucket list. Although I do not have enough money to do so now or in the near future, but I’m hoping against hope to walk in the beautiful streets of Paris someday!

Paris is all about fashion, art, gorgeous people and is best known for its delicious food-everything that makes me truly happy. 😄 

This was my dream place to visit in a nutshell. Where would you like to go? Please let me know ! 

To the self-appointed moral police

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Beforehand writing this piece I want to say that I’m miffed and infuriated how our society works. I distinguish that I’m a part of this society too and to some extent, I’m the problem too .From this moment on I want to change in what way my natural thinking works and be a little more conscious towards the judgments I pass on people unknowingly/grudgingly/due to being jealous.  When we pass judgments we are completely unaware of the effect we have on the being we target, we are being self-centred in doing so and it is not fair to anyone. It is a natural urge to criticize yet we cannot handle the criticisms which are intended to us and that’s why it is unfair to let someone go through what we cannot bear.  Recently I had my real close friend (a guy) Text me that he saw a few people on the road looking at me while he was just passing to go somewhere, I was inquisitive and requested him what did he intend on telling me -he told me that whenever people look at me or talk to me it is scarcely ever because I’m smart or good-looking but because I have a “voluminous” body! THE NERVE OF HIM! I asked him what actually made him draw such assumptions in the first place, for which he voiced me that I have “bigger assets” compared to other girls and that is what makes other people absorbed “to look at me” and that is the reason men “admire and give me attention”  . Oh my goodness, how sick can this fellow get? Being a “good friend” doesn’t he think how telling me those things could just make my confidence hit a ground zero? He went on to suggest how I must change the way I dress in a more “conservative way” where I “hide” my ample assets. HUH. JUST TO BE MORE FITTING IT SEEMS!!! That night, I instantly summon up all the interactions I have had with men and couldn’t help myself but think, what if he is correct. I spent the whole evening thinking about how people perceive me and my body and if my assets were the only interesting aspect about me. It made me incredibly sad, made me question my worth. That was thoroughly horrifying. The next day I woke up and realised a lot of things. First thing, he was not a good friend. Second, what others supposed or didn’t think of me was none of my business. Third, I didn’t have to fucking change the manner I dressed.  When it comes to women I see a lot of men become self-appointed moral police trying to “protect” us by setting rules, telling us a dude’s perception on how they are waiting to devour our body at any minute. Seriously to all these kind of men who think they are only protecting women, we do have our womanly instincts to sense danger and keep away from it. Y’all do not have to instruct us on changing our lifestyle so that we can be more suitable. If whatever you should edify other men about how they possibly treat womankind.  To the overall women out there just be yourself-dress as you like, eat what makes you happy, have opinions even though others might not stay  in agreement with you, go out with your friends, take pictures. As long as you are not putting yourself in potential danger, live your life on your own terms even if people try to tell you otherwise!

You’re FLAWSOME.


Do you know you are beautiful without anyone affirming it to you? Do you know you’re smart without anyone putting a stamp on the fact? Do you know you’re as worthy and as lovable as you’re friend? 

If anything, you should know that you’re worth more than random  opinions people make about you without knowing you. You’re worth more than what your grades say,cliché but truth.

You should also know that you don’t have to change your fashion sense or the choice in your music just to be more likeable.  If you’re someone who doesn’t like what everyone’s loving then that’s okay too. You don’t need to breathe a different air just to be accepted or to fit in. Don’t you think we have too much of msinstream already? Aren’t we just getting tired of this all ? People pretending to be enjoying but they’re the same who feel shallow at night due to their choices but are too afraid to make a change since they’re afraid of not fitting in. Please don’t turn out to be one of them

 The most important thing is don’t force your mind to love and  respect anything with which your beliefs don’t agree with or when your ideologies and morale values are at question.  We all come to a spot in life where our morals will be challanged but that’s the exact time where you need to hold your ground.

Say no ,if you must. Say no to people who are out to take that un noticed  disadvantage from you. Always listen to your instincts,not everyone who laughs with you is a friend! 

At the same time don’t stay rigid, be flexible with your thoughts and opinions.  Be open so that people can talk freely with you without hesitating about getting a judgement.  Listen to everyone’s story and try to be as less judgemental as possible. I know the desire is tempting to just put a label on them,throw them in jar and be done with it. But would you be  happy if others did the same to you? 

Would you be happy if people just judged you based on one quality you posess , put a label on you and treat you accordingly?  Ofcourse you wouldn’t. 

Why let others endure the things which we cannot? Is it fair?  It’s not. 

Also please don’t put your worth and happiness in someone else’s hands that would be too cruel for your soul. No one is careful enough to handle your fragile heart honey,everyone’s heart,happiness and emotions are fragile according to me. They are not only fragile but the fundamental elements of our soul and why should we vest others with the power of handling the very essence of our soul?


Be in charge of your own well being. Take care of your mental health because if there’s no inner peace then life turns out to be chaotic.

My mother always says to me –

Nobody’s indispensable.  I think she is right 😊

Efforts & Appreciation! 

As humans we crave for validation and appreciation, each and everyone of us want to be appreciated for our efforts. Whether we have succeded in our task at hand or not ,we want someone to tell us that-

Hey you’ve put good effort,you’ll get there the next time. 

I mean it’s exhilarating that someone has recognized the amount of thought and work we’ve put into something. 

I’ve always felt that the outcome of anything is almost always secondary. But the efforts and hardwork that we put must always be our prime priority.  I feel that one should never comprise with the efforts by worrying too much about the outcome.

Efforts are our present , failures are our past and outoutcome is our future so don’t you think that  we powerless in changing either our past or our future ? So why worry about something that can’t be predicted or changed?

Sure our past has a lot of influence on our present life. We are the product of our past if you must say !

But we don’t have to stay that way at all. Past is such a solid memory, so sure that we cling onto it like an anchor ,afraid of facing something as unpredictable as the future.  I don’t even recommend you to start predicting your future based upon the incidents of your past & present.

Honestly just tell me did you predict five years ago that you’d be exactly here and exactly doing this with your life? Your predictions may have been even partially right  but were you able to be precise then ,about now?

Then why my dear are you fretting now about your life five years from this day? You please see the algorithm of life , if anything it’s BIZZARE but in a good kind of way.The pieces will eventually fit . You will not miss on the that was meant to be yours . It sounds quite cliché but the universe is in your favour. I’ve been in certain spots of life myself where this cliché was nothing but solid truth! That’s why I’m preaching it.

With that said…moving on

I think one always does better when one is encouraged and when one is appreciated.  So if we know all this ,why do we be so harsh and criticise others left and right? We know how much it absolutely sucks to feel worthless so let’s not make anyone feel that feeling. Atleast try not to .

Criticism is something which is best when given in little amounts , with a nice balance of firmness yet concern wrapped into a few words. The receiver then rejoices!


Thank you for reading!

I WANT TO BE HUMAN.

 

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Why is me being a human not acceptable but me being a nationalist or  as a person of Karnataka ( A state in India) more important? When there is violence in my state and if I don’t support the wrong doers do I become a less of a patriotic towards my state?

Yesterday a huge fight broke out in Bangalore(a city of Karnataka) due to the lack of water supply from an another neighboring state Tamil Nadu.  My state people are not getting sufficient water supply for irrigation,agriculture and for drinking and they are protesting against it. Yesterday from the neighboring state one killed a person of my state and a huge flash strike broke out it in my place(Bangalore). People of my state pelted stones on the buildings, set buses on fire , even started threatening people to not come out of their homes. Schools were dismissed haphazardly ,people on the streets were scared to death to reach a safe place without being mobbed by the crowd. Their relatives and friends who stay in another place were not able to reach them. There was anxiety,chaos , disruption of life and fear everywhere . The idea was to scare the neighboring state and threaten them in giving water supply to us.

Basically ,my state people wanted justice it seems. A GREATER JUSTICE they said,but what about the injustices they were causing to common people? So they wanted justice at the cost of so many injustices like setting buses on fire. OH,YEAH TOTALLY. That’s a fantastic idea to get JUSTICE. If a person from neighboring state kills a person of my state,do you think it is even logical to replicate their actions and start a killing spree too? Is there no means to handle this without bloodshed?

But yesterday I did not want to think as a patriot of my state , I wanted to think as a HUMAN for which I was poorly condemned on Facebook, people told me that I should not think as a rationalist but only as a patriot , that I should think for MY PEOPLE.

But I refuse to think for ONLY “MY PEOPLE”. I WANT TO THINK ABOUT “PEOPLE”! Why is it not going well with them,I don’t get it. Does it make me less of a patriotic to not think of “MY PEOPLE” only?

We see the world is falling apart at the hand of corrupt politicians who ignite the spark,stay comfortable in their offices and make people their puppets to do their dirty work. We see wars,terrorism everywhere among countries , continents  in the name of religion, in the name of sexual orientation of humans. Why is it so hard so accept that we are all people in the end? We are not Hindu,Muslim,Christian,Buddhists , we are all people with flesh and blood. And when you shoot a person there is only red blood we don’t bleed blue or you don’t bleed yellow. We all bleed. We all die.

As a community there will be differences, there will feeling of being unjustified; but politicians(corrupt) ones try to pick on these differences of common people to mint money? To rule? To stay in power? YES FOR ALL THESE REASONS THEY WAGE A WAR.

When we are being divided into communities they make us feel like a team,they misuse the patriotic feelings of the individuals . We maybe being united as Nationalist or based on our religion. BUT WE ARE BEING DIVIDED AS HUMANS.

It does not take much these days to start a communal violence, one post on Twitter or a message on Facebook often times posting  misleading content where they make people furious,encash on our emotions for homeland and that is more than enough these days to pull out a gun or light a match ; going ahead and setting city blaze for JUSTICE.

Irony,such irony I tell you.

Continue reading “I WANT TO BE HUMAN.”

Out of the cocoon. 


It’s 1 am now and now is as good time as any other to blog! The city’s asleep,  no commotion or hustle bustle outside but inside my mind it’s a different story. 

Ever wondered how confusing people can be and I’m talking about me included.  Because I feel it’s just wrong to point fingers at people and society and blaming the rest when I myself am included in both people and society category. 

We people mean one thing and say another, why does that happen?  Have we become too sensitive and too judgemental that every word we utter should be microscopically before scrutinised before coming off our lips  in order to appear acceptable among friends? 

 We take offence too quickly infact at the drop of a hat,  which generally only complicates things further.  I am a huge example for the scenario I micro analyse  everything, it’s a habit and a very bad one which often renders me restless.  I’m always trying to read between the lines to find a hidden meaning or questioning others intentions. Its hopeless, to over think,  really it yields nothing but exhaustion. 

I’m confused, do people always mean what they say and say what they mean? I’m not sure and you know it’s OK to not bother and just let it be.  Because what good is shredding every bit of conversation you have just to make sure if  their intentions are the best?  

So what if their intentions are wrong, it happens.  Sometimes things are out of control and we trust and be friends with people who don’t mean well for  us which we don’t realise initially.  I tell you it’s F. I. N.E. Allow yourself to make mistakes, allow yourself to explore, allow yourself to experience everything out there. Don’t be too afraid and cocooned that this or that might hurt you.  Let it hurt if it has to,  the soul will heal itself.  YOU WILL HEAL. 

So if we are just afraid of being hurt we will never get to where we should be.  We will be  SAFELY stuck in the rut of doing of things in the same old manner without being hurt.  But what kind of excitement  does rhst kind of SAFETY bring? 

So as a girl who had cocooned herself from the world afraid of being gobbled by the big bad monsters hurting her tells you that – –  

Don’t be afraid and don’t worry too much about the consequences.  Because thinking a lot usually spoils the fun!
So go out there and explore everything that is possible in your realms!  If it turns out great you’ll have something to be proud about otherwise you will get hurt but it sure will be worth it.  ⏳⌛